Monday, September 6, 2010
Metal Plate Bossy versus the Grass of Doom
The mad scientists of urban horticulture have developed new mutant grass species and are strategically placing them around the city. I spotted plants that were fully eight feet tall (photo 1) on my great two-hour Labor Day stroll. They didn't seem actively carnivorous, but I was careful to keep my distance all the same. Other grass mutants (photo 2) looked suspiciously reminiscent of the barrel-shaped pods in the movie The Invasion of the Body Snatchers.
Fortunately, Mother Nature has a way of counteracting mankind's schemes. I was relieved to see a newly evolved cow (photo 3) that should be more than a match for the mutant grasses. Metal Plate Bossy will put the environment back into balance. (Milking may be a challenge. Reinforced work gloves and a crescent wrench are recommended.)